鬼地方 / 香港 / 永靖 / 香港大學
鬼地方 - 陳思宏
「永靖對我來說,是個鬼地方,
我一輩子都想逃離。
陳家空廢,連篇鬼話。
我們終究都活不出永靖這個小地方。
陳天宏,出身彰化永靖,一個沒什麼人聽過的小地方。
他是家中么子,爸媽連生了五個沒用的女兒,最後兩胎才拚到男丁。
這么子逃到德國柏林,一心與家鄉割裂,卻意外殺了同志伴侶。
出獄之後,無處可去,只得返回永靖。
故事從島嶼小地方的一天說起,
爸媽大姊二姊三姊四姊五姊哥哥,還有陳天宏,陳家成員輪番登場,
視角切換,光怪陸離的崩壞眾生相逐遭披露,
層層窺見家族的傷痕與醜陋、小鎮的祕密、時代的恐怖與無情。
回到鬼地方的人怎麼面對難堪的過往?
一個小地方又怎麼會變成了鬼地方?」
有一陣子沒看的中文原文小說,陳思宏的「鬼地方」的成功登上美國《紐約時報》秋季書單,也獲「台灣文學金典獎年度百萬大獎」、「金鼎獎文學圖書獎」,實至名歸。
此書圍繞故鄉、男同性戀者在封閉社會的悲歌、和自由,沉重主題下,故事內容曲折離奇,滿足小說最重要的條件 - 好看。
書中的永靖不是我認識的台灣,貧窮、守舊、鄰舍間互相厭惡,或許每人心底都想離開永靖。
有人成功去台北當公務員,卻只感到無盡的苦悶寂寞;
有人考上台灣最高學府,嫁給城中名人,卻慘遭家暴;
主角陳天宏愛讀書、愛男人,在封閉守舊、80年代的台灣鄉下自然活得慘不堪言,好不容易遠走到柏林,意外殺了同志伴侶,出獄之後,竟覺無處可去,返回永靖,到老家和幾個姐姐在沒冷氣的老家吃炸雞扒,互揭瘡疤。
香港、永靖與我
香港跟永靖,以及我成長的背景跟書中主角當然差天共地。
書中的永靖有多落後,我成長的香港就有多繁榮,曾與紐約、倫敦齊名,曾是真正的國際金融中心,曾經很多人有一個香港夢,是人尋求更好生活,而不是想離去的地方。
我是主流社會下的「好學生」、「正常人」、「中產」,循規蹈矩,按步就班的爬社會要求我爬的階梯。
然而,長大以後,一直有一個聲音告訴我,我不適合這個紫醉金迷的城市。因緣際會,我在2019 年尾離開香港,展開新的生活。慶幸的是,獲得家人的支持,也曾在香港接受好的教育,可以自由思考,不會無處可去。我希望將來不管在哪裡,都是自由作的決定,不用到我不願意去的鬼地方。
去年我回到我的小地方
去年㡳回港,到母校香港大學走了一趟,當時寫下的筆記,沒有甚麼大道理,但跟這篇的主題好像意外的配合,在此附錄跟大家分享:
A random walk in HKU back in my trip in November 2023 :
- Bought an iced milk tea without sugar from my favourite wet market shop. The taste of Hong Kong. Which is so strong that wakes you instantly. In HK, I didn’t drink that much coffee, as there’s no need.
- Started at Wong Hek King building. This is a vivid sight. The first time I set foot in HKU.
- Before getting to centennial building, I had to walk pass the Swire canteen. There was a huge red sculpture back then. Where is it now? What else have we lost?
- To centennial building - the first year I got into University, it was opened and it was a big deal.
- At the law school - there were promotion of talks of national security and basic laws; and at the same time the banner which says “injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere”. What does justice mean anymore? It almost feels like new-speak now.
- There were many mainland students taking photo in crappy suits with odd hairstyle and makeup. Indeed, I hardly hear any Cantonese. Maybe it’s because mainlanders are more hardworking.
- There were primary school kids who visited HKU. Of course, those kids spoke Mandarin. One of the boys asked, in his exact words 「香港大學係國家算是幾流的大學」. Good question.
- Then I took a walk from the law library to Swire canteen. Which was the further-est distance you could walk in HKU. Walking between two places between two classes was the worst thing I faced, as a HKU student back then.
- The view of the campus is still great.
- I got a bit sentimental. And I’m grateful that I studied in some of the best years there.
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