The Power of the Right Questions

Life can be overwhelming, especially when it gets outside of our realm of understanding. For example, if you're like me, you  know very little about cars except it gets you from point A to point B. But when it suddenly breaks down on the side of the road, you can feel completely lost and unsure of what to do next. This is how it feels when life gets un-understandable - lost and uncertain, struggling to make sense of the complexities around us.

But it's not just cars that can leave us feeling lost and overwhelmed. If we think too much about the suffering of the cow which became the steak we enjoy, or the hunger issues in some of the poorest states in Africa, life can and will be insufferable. On another extreme, if you constantly think about when would Spurs win the NBA again, it is unlikely to bring impacts to your life (and, it might not happen soon. Sorry to all Spurs friends). This leads us to an important question: What are the questions we should ask ourselves?

For me, I focus on the questions that matter most to me. As a lawyer, I create lists for everything - from laundry lists to life questions. And when it comes to the latter, there are a few criteria that I keep in mind:

1. The question is important to me.
2. The question is interesting.
3. The question is something that I have at least some control over, or that I could make a positive impact on my life by exploring.
   

By focusing on these questions, I gain clarity on what matters most to me and am better able to sort out my priorities (read my previous blog on priorities here). Here are seven questions that are currently on my list:

1. How can I make the people I love happy and safe?
2. How can I maintain good health?
3. How can I stay calm and control my emotions in difficult situations?
4. How can I get enough money so that I don’t have to worry about money anymore?
5. Where is a good place to live at and call home?
6. How can I advance my career, or how important is my career to me?
7. How can I keep up with the rapid pace of technological change?

With these questions in mind, I start small projects and work on them. I work on getting a second passport to open up new options. I exercise regularly and try meditation. I learn about investments. I teach myself the basics of coding and try out the latest technologies. And I'm always on the lookout for short trips to take with my family. All these little projects are linked to the "big" questions above.

Approaching life with a sense of humility and clarity, accepting the things we cannot change with grace, and focusing our efforts on the things we can - this might just be the key to finding a sense of peace and balance in the midst of life's chaos and uncertainty.

Give it a try! Think about three questions to add to your own life list and share them with me in the comments below.